Open hands

I find myself so often saying I trust the Lord, I know He is in control but then daily, hourly I fail Him and my trust waivers. It's a subconscious attitude I don't even know I'm doing. I want so deeply to have open hands and trust but its so hard. I'm not alone, right? I say God I trust you with my family, my babies but then I fear daily: are they safe, what if they get hurt, what if they drown, what if they get cancer? All the time!! Then I find myself thinking I know better, like this job is what I need, this decision is right for me, sometimes forgetting He knows best, forgetting to be on my knees about it and trusting Him to know what decision should be made! I want to trust, I do, I want to have open hands. I pray daily for my unbelief to truly believe the things I say and think I really believe. I want to have open hands with my kids, my family.

Psalms 61:2 From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint, when my heart is overwhelmed lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

Thank God there is someone higher than I that is warring for my soul! He loves ME, man isn't that an amazing feeling.

This, gosh, it speaks volumes to me EVERY time I listen to it. You have to listen until 3:20 when John Piper starts speaking. Amen!!!

It wasn't meaningless-it's doing something!! Of course you can't see what it's doing!

Do NOT lose heart!

Oh Jesus!! Help my unbelief! Help me to live with open hands and believe it without doubt!

Help me to trust you with my babies, my family, my future! You alone know and are what I live for!

And because this song has been on repeat for me over the last 48 hours and has been encouraging to me I thought I would share!